The Prodigal

This is the missing man.. This is Jim... my husband.. and my children's father. He is the missing man... the man that walks around today calling himself Jim Ewers.. is NOT this man... This new person is NOT the man I married. The man I married is very affectionate and loving. He is funny and made me feel safe and protected.

I miss MY husband. I miss sitting on the couch and cuddling. I miss cooking for him. I miss watching the ritual goodbye before work between Adam and daddy. I miss his hands. He has great hands.. strong and large.. but not too rough.

I still love my husband. And I always will. I promised to love him until the day I die.. and I will keep my promise. I hope that he knows this.

Right now I asked him for no contact... for at least 2 weeks (he's already texted me twice and it hasn't even been a WEEK! haha) I need to spend time with God and allow Him to teach me how to forgive Jim, and how to speak to him with love and kindness and respect. It's so very very hard to speak to him in that way. So I will continue to pray and read God's word and hopefully get to a place where I can be a LOT less angry.